As The Team Edward Vs. Team Jacob Battle Divides The Nation, The Senate Intervenes

President Barack Obama selected Elena Kagan to be a nominee for the Supreme Court. For those of you who don’t follow these things, the Supreme Court is to America as the Volturi are to Twilight. But before Kagan gets the job, she has to suffer through a grueling Senate confirmation proceeding.

The point of the hearing is to make sure she’s qualified for the job. Totally important, super serious stuff. Which is why one Senator decided to ask her about Twilight:

KLOBUCHAR: You had an incredibly grueling day yesterday, and did incredibly well, but I guess it means you missed the midnight debut of the third Twilight movie last night. We did not miss it in our household, and it culminated in three 15-year-old girls sleeping over at 3 a.m. So I have this urge to ask you about this –

KAGAN: I didn’t see that.

KLOBUCHAR: I keep wanting to ask you about the famous case of Edward v. Jacob, or The Vampire v. The Werewolf.

KAGAN: I wish you wouldn’t.

KLOBUCHAR: Well I know you can’t comment on future cases.

Oh man, I know Twilight fever has taken over the country, but can we at least keep it out of the Supreme Court? Kagan has gone on record saying that the confirmation process is little more than showmanship and farce, and after this she probably won’t be taking those words back.

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