Top Gun’s 14 Most Memorable MomentsThursday, December 17, 2009 1:55 PM
During the Reagan reign of the 1980′s, we saw a lot of patriotic films that got us all revved up about beating the commies (and in some cases, those pesky Libyans!). Top Gun tops that list as one of our favorite 80′s military movies. Sure, the script oozes with 80′s cheese, and yes, we noticed that Tom has since taken a turn for the worse (he’ll never live down Oprah as far as I’m concerned). But you can’t deny the awesomeness of his iconic motorcycle ride down the runway set to the sound of “Danger Zone” (see #8.). Take a look at the 14 most memorable moments from Top Gun.
1
The Volleyball Sequence
Director Tony Scott secretly sprinkled fairy dust on Tom Cruise and Val Kilmer’s cereal the morning this scene was shot, resulting in one of the gayest moments in movie history. In fact, the first time Quentin Tarantino saw Top Gun, he mistook it for gay porn. Today, it’s a right of passage; all guys have to get through the volleyball sequence before they can call themselves men.
2
Maverick and Iceman Bond
The team gives Maverick a standing ovation as he triumphantly returns to the USS Enterprise. “You can be my wingman anytime,†Iceman tells him. “Bullshit,†says Mav, “You can be mine.†They hug, and the term “wingman†is forever stamped into Man Vocabulary. A new era is born.
3
The Locker Room Scene
Maverick and Iceman square off in a “macho†contest. Hilarity ensues when Mav screams, “That’s right! I am dangerous!†When this comes from 4’11″ Cruise, what can you do besides laugh? Cry? Iceman responds by biting the air in front of Mav’s face. Manly.
4
Buzzing the Tower
Cruise built his entire career on flamboyant displays of nonsense, and this scene fits his m.o. perfectly. Oh, and by career, I mean his personal life too. Watch as Tom takes his jet right past the tower and yet somehow doesn’t get court-marshaled.
5
Goose’s Death
Goose’s death in Top Gun really kicks the emotion into high gear. Grown men have been known to weep uncontrollably when the world’s best wingman breaks his neck on a botched ejection. Apparently, some people still haven’t gotten over that scene. For example, watch this homemade tribute to Goose’s death made by someone with a lot of free time on their hands.
6
You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling
This scene showcases Tom Cruise ability to ooze with classic ’80s cheese. No self-respecting guy would sing this song in an attempt to get laid. But our hero doens’t take no for an answer. When Charlie shoots him down, he follows her into the (ladies) bathroom. Most guys would go to jail for that, but not in Top Gun.
7
Banging Kelly McGillis
The only thing better than looking at Kelly McGillis is banging Kelly McGillis. After a hectic car chase through the hills of San Diego, Charlie (Kelly) tracks Maverick down. Bingo. Mav gets to do the teacher. It’s a little hotter now that Kelly has come out as a lesbian, but she waited until she was in her 50′s to share that, so who cares. Now it’s just gross.
8
The Danger Zone
Set to “Danger Zone,†by Kenny Loggins, this scene imprinted Top Gun in our minds forever. Unfortunately, “Danger Zone†never hit #1 because it had to compete with another song from the soundtrack, “Take My Breath Away.†Fun fact: Kilmer wrote for “Take My Breath Away†for Cruise after they wrapped shooting. BFF!
9
Charlie’s Briefing
Mav talks back to Charlie in front of the whole class, sporting one of the biggest, smuggest, shit-eating-grins in the history of cinema. George Clooney modeled his entire career on Cruise’s performance in this scene. “So you’re the one,†Charlie says, her voice full of wonder. Give me a friggin break.
10
Great Balls of Fire
Meg Ryan, who plays Goose’s feisty Southern woman, recounts all the poon Mav has slaughtered over the years. Charlie seems to admire her new boyfriend for this (why can’t all girls be more like Charlie?) Clearly, Charlie doesn’t concern herself with minor details like STDs, including the AIDS epidemic (remember this was the mid-80s).
11
Maverick’s First Day Of Flight Training At Top Gun
On Mav’s very first run at Top Gun, he recklessly breaks two rules of engagement, but still manages to outfly his instructor, Rick “Jester†Heatherly. At the end of the run, Mav famously “buzzes the tower.†This would be quite a performance for anyone, but for Cruise the hardest part was showing up. Then again, Scientologists don’t get intimidated unless they are outside the “seventh circle.â€
12
Slider. You Stink.
During one of Mav’s attempts to get into Charlie’s pants, she shoots him down in front of the guys. Slider snickers at the situation, so Mav tells Slider that he “stinks.” Is this how guys shit-talked in the 80s? Slider gets really self conscious (as over-compensating meatheads often do,) and he … wait for it … smells himself. Phenomenal.
13
“I’m Not Going To Blow Sunshine Up Your Assâ€
Viper (Tom Skeritt) tries to convinces Maverick to graduate despite Goose’s recent death. “I’m not going to blow sunshine up your ass,†he begins. Skeritt delivers this line during a very serious situation, but his perfect timing and delivery make it impossible not to crack up. Plus, based on previous scenes between Cruise and Kilmer, any dialogue involving “ass†and “sunshine†just seems to fit.
14
Mav Gets His Balls Back
Immediately after graduation, Maverick, Slider, Hollywood, Iceman and Wolfman must report to a “crisis situation.†They spring into action so quickly, one would think Tom Ford just showed up to give away free Aviators and sign autographs on the poopdeck. Mav joins the fight, dominates the battle, and returns to the USS Enterprise a triumphant hero. He goes then goes on to become a flight instructor for Top Gun. The friggen end.
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